Just did shrooms. Don't feel shit! Wsasted 40 bucks on this! Nothing's happenig except for this little gnome on my shoulder and the couch is melting. Fuckin waste of money.
I guess she didn't feel like it. There was hair all over it and everything
I thought the fact that I took home a 42 year old with 3 kids would excuse my tardiness this morning because my boss is also 42 and has 3 kids. Boy was I wrong.
I woke up in a house cuddled up with a beagle on a futon. have no idea who anyone is but they all call me stretch. yeaaahhh boiiiiii
So I got a little fucked up on the punch, and made out with the family friend. Which is apparently morally reprehensible. I don't get that.
he said he wants to do me james and the giant peach style. im afraid of what that means. but moderately excited. wish me luck.
Freshman ate returning to campus. Let Operation Slut Storm commence.
When he goes down on me, he stares me in the eyes like a shark mocking it's prey as it devours it. Plus, his beard smells like dirty gym socks. This has got to end.
I came out, you were peeing on the car and when I asked why you said it deserved it because its a rental
Just be aware that next year I will probably try to seduce you to avoid going to the gym
Alls I remember is making out with that chick.
Nope that was a dude
Super stoned right now. And I stared at my exit, thought to myself "hey self. That is your exit" and I kept driving right past it.
Do the molecules within bourbon change when mixed with a cola to form a superior liquid treat?
Babe if there was a way to give a back rub and head at the same time that's what I would ask for my birthday, Christmas and of course right now. Please think about how and get back to me.
If hypothetically I needed to puke on the bus... how would I go about doing this.
Randomize
