didnt we say no more talking to eachother
it will help you get over me i promise
im horny
ok i will unlock the door
it sounds like her vocal chords are covered in pudding and rocks. come get me.
Just did shots with my boss to warm up for our sales call to Childrens Hospital. I love startups.
just had an encounter with drunk people from out of state at dairy queen. they wanted to stay till march to see the high school play.
My aunt totally just drunk dialed me when i was super stoned, it was so intense
So after I pop out this baby we need to just go on a monthlong coke binge so I can get skinny again before vegas
Watching the gap toothed girl get more ass than me is almost devastating.
Things got outta hand once she told me to water-board her with Patron.
Call me when you get back form court. Hopefully its not later than noon. Just remember..win or lose we still booze.
He just dragged himself across the floor on his back claiming to be "the swiffer" help
And don't worry, my exact words were "I can't believe a baby came outta that thing"
I think the exact words were 'I'd lett him to the weirdest shit to me'
the quiet that you are hearing is a silent suggestion that you should go fuck yourself
Moral of the story: next time my plans include you and bourbon, I'm packing a toothbrush.
i hooked up with all four beatles on halloween get on my level
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