This got awkward about two "Oh yeah"s ago.
But why is there no point in liking him? Does he have herpes? Is he married? Is he gay? Did he get his penis chopped off in a freak accident? If the answer is no to all of the above, then he is fair game
woke up with the dennys waiters MYSPACE link on the back of my receipt...yep one of those nights
You were such a shitshow...I was just standing in the kitchen eating my toaster strudel and you came in, whispered "you didn't see anything" and led him to the couch
I'm sorry but I have WAY too many sex/ hookup related bruises on visible areas to be going home tmrw
I just crashed on my couch and have no intention of ever getting up again
I will be over with a bedpan and beer
My last 2 google image searches were 'a lot of pudding' followed by 'a generous portion of pudding'
Vodka and Jamison is not a mixed drink
I burned myself with a joint twice in one sitting I have to say that's a new record for the least number of times I have hurt myself while smoking.
I have no concept of chastity or moderation, she is a Catholic guilt poster child, how could I not try to hit that
You texted me the words "butt stuff" 53 times in a four hour period last night.
I think I got into an argument with my cat's former owner about what a BDSM relationship entails.
god i just can't wait for finals to end so i can just masturbate all day and night
Fun fact: I came home from the riverboat without my panties. And woke up with a different pair on.
Yeah, we got drunk and stole road signs.
Randomize
