I just saw a stripper wear a tube top around her floppy gut. God bless Michigan.
I just saw a girl walking home wearing a tshirt, boxers, and cowboy boots. Thanks for having the decency to drive me to my car.
So my boyfriend is on his way over and there is no time to wash the sheets from when I had his roommate over earlier. Put them in the dryer with a damp bounce sheet. Win?
This is a whole new level of slut for you....do they smell ok?
Your cock is gonna weep like a baby
There are eight sets of guys I've made out with who have the same name. It's like noah's ark in my mouth.
Is this helping you get pumped up or am I going to have to send you more dick pics?
I used to think not drinking while I was pregnant was not gonna be a problem, but I now I'm like shit that's a long time
How bad is it I'm looking at his cock while waiting to see my therapist?
your life is going to be an empowering working mom montage tomorrow to Katy P's ROAR... --are you living in a yoplaít comercial?
Smoking a bowl and ordering Dominos, you want in on either, both, or none?
Only I could turn my one night stands into class essays. Go me.
Anytime he goes down on me i automatically think of you cheering me on. Your a good friend.
there is a tent in the living room. its a vip tent room. i want in.
Let's do something tonight. I feel like setting things on fire.
all I remember is them saying he had a big dick and the next thing I know I’m leaving with him
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