You remember that guy Joey? The pastors son that plays Jesus every year?
Yeah?
Stuck it in his pooper.
I don't understand how anyone could look at him and think, 'Yeah, that's a good idea.'
open bar reception. dayglow. pray for me
Yeah, he said he was getting "welcome back Winnipeg Jets drunk" then puked on his jersey.
I totally just friend requested the girl I met in jail last night so that I could give her back the sunglasses she lent me upon our release. See, I'm not a total delinquent.
I AM OVERLY HIGH AND OVERLY AWARE OF MY TONGUE IN MY MOUTH
The shit show didn't end. it just relocated itself to my apartment instead of yours.
you also need to get my treadmill fixed.
He purred while eating me out. HE PURRED AND I LIKED IT.
But college guys get to crossfade so there's that
No idea what that is
Like getting bent? When you drink and smoke together...
I'm 30 stop using your cool kids words
I'm ready to get married, then we can lie around watching anime and eating pizza while he rubs baby oil on me
You had me on my knees catching cheese balls in my mouth and moaning. In front of all your friends.
He was leaving the restaurant I was going to as I was parking. I didn't want to scream, "hey, didn't I jerk you off?" Out of my window at 10 am
I was gonna make a strong case for you to be my midnight kiss, but poptarts sound good too
I solemnly swear to help bail you out of jail when you throw a dildo at a politician.
wow bdsm is so cute
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