I DON'T KNOW WHERE WE ARE WE ARE TOO FUCKING ELEVATED.
Me either! Fuck yeah, 12th and something. 12th and hamburger stand.
so i was dancing to the glee soundtrack with highheels. i tripped. and the dildo fell on my face. i dont know what happened.
maybe i'll see you again later :)
I'd rather shit a knife.
all they had in the fridge was rum and filled water balloons
You should see the damage i did to the apartment last night. So many broken things and butter sticks stuck to windows.No memorys
She's the perfect storm when it comes to psycho stalkers
When my alarm went off, he rolled over and asked me: Bacon or dick? Yes, I will see him again.
Currently in the bathroom stall of a gay bar in new haven giving myself an anti throw up pep talk
Ive never seen him vulnerable before. He just had surgery and looked so cute on his crutches. like a little baby bird with a broken wing. that i wanted to nurse back to health. with my vagina
Yeah I'm at the doctors getting a shotand don't know how to tell them I'm still probably drunk from last night
Where were you last night, and why am I not surprised that drag queens were involved?
Me and mom just bonded over our mutual desire to bang Mark Ruffalo. I'm not sure how to feel about this.
My sinuses still burn from snorting red wine last night.
Go have a frustration cry and get over it
I'm sorry you had to knock him out on your birthday. But that also means I won the bet that you'd hit someone so you owe me 40. dollars
Randomize
