They say you shouldnt they say its no good for the environment in your vagina
i effin hate jeff goldbloom.
but i totally would still bang him
you said you didn't feel like drinking anymore so you mixed vodka with your applesauce and ate it
every single kid we've ever known, every single person we've gotten blow jobs from, every single person we've hit home runs with... is at dennys right now
I can get orange kush...
GET IT NOW! WHY IS THERE A DOT DOT DOT?!
Would you like me to write a persuasive essay on how you should let me suck your dick?
I'm also 3/4 on the frats. Its like my goal of traveling to all 7 continents, but different somehow and a lot less morally sound.
I need to shotgun another beer. Where's the machete?
I mean there are things broken right and left, I woke up surrounded by dog statues, and we had a vodka bubble bath.
He should know he can't successfully wrestle in pudding fully clothed. Amateur.
I was gonna start crying but as he was asking me for my info i saw him eyeing my rack. So I sorta started pushing them together. He asked me to get out of the car he made me turn around so he could check me out and then he said and I quote "okay ma'am. Everything is fine, I'm going to let you off with a warning. Next time if you're not wearing yoga pants you might not be as lucky" I am blessed.
I am descending into that finals week rage fueled by ramen, mountain dew and bad sex is what's up.
I'm disease and pregnancy free. This is an Easter for the books!
Tonight I'm getting fucked up for America because Lord knows we need it.
I'll be an awkward "I've had the grooms penis in my mouth" presence and we can party our nipples off.
Randomize
