belinda wants 2 know wr u got ur butt pads
i dont wear butt pads that thang is au naturel
Yeah...right...LMAO
Im eating ham and mustard naked, watching south park, but its totally cool cuz the paper plate is covering my nuts
Do you ever go through someone elses pictures and just appreciate the fact that youre not really friends with them?
Slut skills are useful in every country.
We need to get her some penis inspired head protection.
toilet paper cling ons are not as adorable as the little red cub makes them look on the charmin commercials.
I came home to burning cookies and him outside "tanning" naked.
He just wants an even tan
I don't remember anything other than how good it felt when I peed my pants.
One minute we were getting noise complainted by the security guards the next I was shotgunning a beer with them
Im at target. Idk why I'm buying condoms AND a tutu for my cat. No one who dresses their cat up has ever gotten laid.
Yepp, I had to be the one to explain that the girl who was slapping people in the face with a dildo was my drunk girlfriend.
Lol, you asked the waitress to box up someone else's discarded food last night
He yelled at me to keep it in my pants and I replied with I will fuck your roommate as much as I please. Oops
I feel like my cat and I are playing mind games. I need more friends.
I'm a delicate orchid of a man.
Blossoming into a fierce dragon.
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