I dont shave on purpose to keep myself from being slutastic!! it usually works
I cannot find my penis.
I thought she would fill the void you created. Turns out she thought I just wanted to fill hers.
a woman just threw her tv out the window while screaming "will you fucking work now?". i'm never moving
Im already sauced. Have been for hours. Its kinda my thing.
I'm 90% sure a girl here is wearing a bra strap as a headband.
By the end of the cruise, there was literally nothing in our room he hadn't peed on.
Turns out puking in your mask makes it even harder to see out of the mask..
Doing a circuit workout and using a power hour playlist for my 1 minute timers. I am getting old. creative, but old.
well a fat roach just fell out of my hair. so there's that
look on the scale of 1 to the time you hit an old lady with your car chlamydia barely even rates
the fact that i came three times was completely negated by the fact that he high-fived himself after.
it will be just like last year but no clogged toilets and more costumes.
Just took a shot of 151, rimmned my middle finger in it, lit it on fire and lit a cigarette off it while flicking off my boss. How was your night??
What can i say, my face is nice and my body is just unreal. And my beer pouring/stealing is incredible \n
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