can a staight man not wear seersucker in this town?
i just fell asleep masturbating. I'm no longer surprised i'm single. I can't even pleasure myself.
I think you came in my ear last night and I had to pick it out infront of my kids in class today
Beverly Hills, 90210. Cleveland Browns, 0.
I just five second ruled a donut I dropped at starbucks, everyones staring
Almost accidentally stole a baby... explain later
So... he formspringed me a link to every nude pic ive taken since he 8th grade. ive evolved nicely. but im nervous as to how this a website.
his eyes are fucked up, he bumped into the cabinet while standing in my office, and he's pounding chicken soup, and he must have chewed on 8 pieces of gum before he got here.
I just want to see him this morning so I can bask in my wasted accomplishment.
If you hear a loud thud and smell ozone, I may have been electrocuted.
I'm fucking camped out by the bathrooms. I think the poopatrator is in there. Wtf is my life
Almost an end to the saga.
You sending me our unborn, unfertilized babies' names is not what I envisioned when you said you'd "drunk text me later".
it was the most awkward makeout ever. it was record breaking really
...i feel like you have a lot of those.
Either I'm getting old or the shit show is playing earlier than it used to...
We were playing fuck marry kill and he was eavesdropping so I said I would fuck him
It was like catching dick in a barrel
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