Send those Picts to my email please. From last night
Ps thx for the porn on my phone
;) ur welcome
it's not our fault the pink and the sink are so close together.
The men handing out bibles on the quad are blatantly skipping me... am i that obvious
What can i say, inner beauty is great but it makes a hard picture to jack off to
i woke up to the sound of my roommate climbing onto my desk mumbling that she was going to bed
He's high as balls tripping balls and doing a reenactment of the scene where Buzz jumps off the balcony and can't fly to his soundtrack of Toy Story.
Oh my god. I'm not ready to be an adult. I'm not ready.
Well despite the fact that I'm still not entirely sure this isn't an elaborate/cunning plan to kill me, I'm in.
Not saying puking on the side of a cab was how I imagined freshman year of med school but...
You gotta start bringing a flask to work so you can get a head start
Possibly a very genius or very terrible idea...
You made out with him a lot. Almost as much as you told everyone Paul was the zamboni guy.
we should most definitely have a fire extinguisher in the apartment. like... for sure
Is there such thing as dick sucking teeth guards?
The boob job was worth every penny just to see the expression of pure joy on his face the first time he saw them.
Had a vaginal orgasm. I feel like I made sex my bitch.
Randomize
