just caught a 10 year old kid staring at my dick next to me in the urinal. i just nodded to him and said yeah, mines bigger little dude. i gotta stop drinking in public....
Not quite sure what happened last night. I'll drive your dresser over to you later.....
Oh I already celebrated valentine's day. I stayed up until 4 AM listening to biggie, drinking rum, and caressing all my girl curves in front of the mirror. And then I came 3 times.
So last night I taught an old homeless dude to respond to "Blue" so I could shout your my boy Blue at the party
A BJ like that needs to be recommended.
On the train at 650am after a night of clubbing and running away from a new zealander who was buying us beers but also licking windows
I solemnly swear I will not get your boyfriend puke in public drunk again
HEY. NO. THIS IS ABOUT YOU RIGHT NOW. YOUR COCK, MY MOUTH, THATS IT.
I feel like David Hasselhoff when he's drunk eating that cheeseburger and crying. But with cheesecake.
video games take priority over anything else you can offer me.
He radiates elegant sexual dominance. I bet even his balls have pinstripes.
I'm pretty sure I regained my virginity last night
What happened last night? All I know is that I walked into class this morning and everyone was chanting my name.
I'm not too sure what happened last night, but by the looks of it, we must have gotten drunk with zebras.
And then there was cum in my hair and he was making beans.
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