took shots out of a medicine cup. i can get used to college.
Is it bad that when I see babies I feel bad for them because its going to be forever until they are 21?
Who the hell brings a 6pack to a party. I'm trying to make mistakes.
Hah, I lost the lenses in my glasses, didn't event notice til this morning... How was the meeting?
I can't break up with him, I ran the math. Taking into account his 7 inch penis and the standard deviation from average, almost 90% of guys should have a smaller penis than he does.
Really? Penis math? This is why guys shouldn't date female engineers.
Passing out is my livers way of protecting my mind.
I did something similar high once. I stopped like 30 feet in front of a stop sign because I felt like it was running towards me and I started crying. Got out my car and hugged it and told it not to run away people need it.
I mean I'm into guys with money but more into guys I'm actually attracted to
yeah i guess i'd rather he was hot than rich
wow i don't know if that qualifies as growing up but if it does i'm all in
My only regret this past weekend is abusing only 3 substances when I could have done so much more.
Dude I swear I'm scooping human shit out of the litter boxes. What the fuck happened last night?
when I was walking home I wad so excited to see a cat on the sidewalk but it was really a traffic cone
Just witnessed a man yell "gonna catch a slut!" at himself in the mirror while doing bicep curls at the gym.
I was...perplexed.
Gave a guy a blowjob in a convent. Place in hell is now secured...
You were filing your nipples with a nail file to "make them sharper"
Turns out dignity is priceless and Plan B costs $41.09
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