Facials are how you say "I love you" in porn star.
Is it wrong that im more embaressed about the karoke than the toplessness?
I woke up to his little sister feeling me up. I guess it's time to meet the family.
Hung over. Bed full of legos for some reason. Not getting up. Come build stuff with me.
Sitting here reading the internet and all i have to show for this summer is a shitty tan and the possible case of clamidia.
2 things: 1) can you get hep from toilet water? And 2) do you know where we can get a new skillet for cheap?
Please tell me those aren't related.
I made rice.
I just told a bottle to be chill
and meant it
sooo trippy being back in town after 5 years. if you had asked me in high school who would be future coke heads, i would have been way off
Dude she tried to bite my face off last night, literally. I have never actually felt like a piece of meat until that point in life...
I wrote myself a letter, like I think drunk me wants to be pen pals or something
i want george washington to fuck me as hard as he can holy shit
Not sure who they are or where we're going but they just bought me 3 tacos so I'm staying.
I'll text you when I have a mental breakdown about it.
Please do.
Im glad your laughing because im currently convincing my penis you didnt mean it and its all gunna be ok.
He's the first boyfriend I wouldn't cheat on. This is a really big deal for me
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