i can't help myself.. i am just so in love with the kitchen manager.
...he was wearing JNCO shorts.. i'm pretty sure i saw the dragon.
you might want to delete the history when you're done using the computer at work. did you ever find out what the white balls in your throat were?
why do all the strippers look like they came from fraggle rock
I think I need to stop sleeping with him. Sex with him is just a reminder of the mediocrity of the rest of my life.
It was huge And he was twirling it around. Im telling you, beautiful wonderpenis
what is the protocol for being hungover enough to vomit in a potted plant during my botany lecture?
Lost my virginity in a banana suit. Glad I waited.
I really just want to stuff him in my purse, take him home, feed him pudding or applesauce and brush his hair. That's not creepy, right?
I FINALLY HAVE A REASON TO DYE MY PUBES BLUE!!!
My tits, and hanging out behind a hotel eating pizza.
And then he said, "let's have sex and I'll send you home with enchiladas."
The Stanley Cup Final is killing me. I can't go to work drunk again.
He's literally cuddling with the washer and dryer.
Real life skills section of my resume: blow jobs, food knowledge trivia, sarcasm, mascaera application, sexting, tolerance of rail liquors
Come over. Bring drugs. My sister is making cookies. She took Valium. They should be badass cookies.
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