I just had to explain to the pharmacy cashier that the Plan B and thank you notes I was buying were not related.
guys are not supposed to queef...right?
nothing this campus sells is worth it. not even sex.
you should buy a sheep. A) you get an awesome pet. B) free coat
New channing tatum movie.
I'll bring my vibrator.
You know, be my cock's hype man.
What's the address?
Too drunk. Just google it.
IT'S YOUR HOUSE
He tried to puke in the 14th hole and when I told him to stop he started chanting "hole in one hole in one"
I just shit my pants and had a heart attack. Simultaneously. May or may not be related to this game.
Surely the maintenance men have seen worse than that condom right
I wish I could be happy with a nice Christian girl, but no, I need a hot mess who starts bar fights
I never forget a pussy, even blackout me gives me that memory.
I'm literally in the bathroom for two minutes and I walk out to a random dude with his face in your tits
Cocaine is ok on a cleanse, right?
I woke up to find I still had sequins under my tits. I'd say Sunday was a success.
Randomize
