I've come to the conclusion that as a grad student I would much rather prefer to get laid then get drunk
I think you know full well that a few years ago my stance was the polar opposite
Let's get naked and see who's stronger.
He's been dead since March and more people write on his wall than mine.
he just invited me over for the 3 p's...pepsi pizza and porn...I'm gonna marry him
I could hear them screwing through my bedroom wall again this morning, so I started beat boxing to the tempo.
One day her vagina is just going to shrivel up and seal itself with it's self preservation mechanism
Watch out, there's a giant vagina in the quad running around screaming at people.
Omg just opened my passenger side door and my outfit from last night is on the floorboard.
I built a fence. For the bunnies we're going to adopt. I'll fill you in when you get home.
Hey I didn't mean to be all lemme get with your ex husband.
You started crawling towards a moving train. Maybe you should take it easy next time
Learning to live poor pretty well. Cashed in all the coins in my car for nearly 60 bucks and yelled at a Pizza Hut manager, insisting I have a free pizza credit, until he just gave me a pizza.
Just sold our expired ticket for a free night of bowling to a drunk guy downtown for 50 bucks. Ill buy beer on my way home
Woke up with a bed full of sand...care to explain?
Isnt is self explanatory?
Bahahah I should. I’m the free range drunk girl who should clearly not be free range because who knows what kind of fuckery I would get into
Randomize
