If only Ben were 51% gay instead of 49%
I sent you an email today but due to work restrictions, I had to misspell choke sex
why do our vaginas work when we are blacked out?? it's just not fair.
the nurse was shocked when I handed her a cup of green piss. what did she expect giving me a drug test on st. patty's day?
you just started pointing at the light and whispering "star wars"
He's drinking red wine in a margarita glass. He couldn't be more perfect for me.
Should we start at nine like normal people or now like alcoholics?
I have discovered my latent superpower. If a friend is dating a bi chick they will inevitably try and talk me into a threesome.
I'm getting offered Candy Crush lives in return for sex. Like wtf.
i've written a new chapter in the saga of unexpected dongs
So is there a reason your dad is passed out naked in my shower? P.S. Congrats on the family dong.
I didn't get it..
I'm sorry. But to the original question please.
i just found a red feather stuck to my penis and i really wanted to send you a picture but too much
we talked about the guy being eaten by the anaconda.. Then I proceeded to blow him
How is it??
I'm drinking Gatorade out of a champagne flute.
when you shit yourself on the way to school its time to give up and go home
Randomize
