I couldn't get internet on my iPod in this hotel room for porn, so I made due with UFC.
I'm not sure what to say to that.
I think my penis and your vagina just became best friends last night.
i used the phrase horny rhinos in my paper. i hope my teacher appreciates the size of my balls
Our cab driver just admitted to beating up kids in the 60's who didn't smoke pot...
My dad walked in on me masturbating in my own apartment.....my own apartment!!
incase your class ends early, there are three naked guys in our room. but don't get too excited, they're all gay.
Yea it's a sex scar. But if anyone asks I tripped up carpeted stairs
His personality is sparkling but nothing beats his ass
The best of us have puked in our office garbage cans. I just hope yours wasn't the metal mesh kind...and bagless like mine. Rock n roll office manager.
Seriously? People are paying $45 for Surge?!? I've seen better one night stand decisions being made then the choices being made on amazon orders of Surge
I just showed this kid my nipples to work my shift tmw
Everyone should just give me a copy of their keys. I take your dog out and I bring beer.
How drunk you think somebody has to be, that they think that putting out a profile pic like that can be even a slightly good idea?
whoevers yellow car is in your driveway right now... i plan to steal. just an FYI
Anyway, that's been my evening- crying and looking up diabetes symptoms. How was your night?
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