OMg patrick swayze is the sexuest man he is killing me I'm gonna get dehydrated if I don't stop looking at him
So as she is about to take the walk of shame she flips out. Apparently someone left a brown present in her shoes.
And he showed us your test. You wrote what is this shit and scribbled on it? Nice 3%..
Most guys don't get turned on by "skinny, gangly legged girl with glasses laying in bed touching herself." You better start working on your diction if you're gonna keep up the sexting.
He is in the front yard trying to catch birds out of the air with a fishing net.
She said I walked up to the McDonalds counter and ordered just a cup full of pickles then proceeded to offer some to everyone in the place.
I answered the door to some Jehovah Witnesses hungover and wearing nothing but a white tshirt. I think they made it the church goal to reform me, we've gotten four pamphlets. My mom's going to make me convert if they keep coming.
You're just horny.
Yea, and? I appreciate you as a person too if that helps.
I knew I was in trouble when she kept referring to the next day as things we should do
So you brought her to my house and left her on my couch.
You know you had a good night when your wearing you best friends pants to work the next day
That said I did get head on the roof of a 15 story building which, regardless of quality, is still cool
Do him. As soon as possible and as often as possible. That's what Oprah would say
I moved to this city Tuesday and got laid Saturday. Still got it.
i told someone my fallback plan was to be a slutty bartender and i needed the practice as i straddled them to pour a shot
The guy I slept with in AZ just called and is moving here next week.
Randomize
