just ate pastrami before passing out in my hotel room. My room smells like a petting zoo
You should never have let annie watch you have sex with other women
Our cab driver just admitted to beating up kids in the 60's who didn't smoke pot...
she is medically diagnosed as a nympho. she has the paper to prove it. hell. fucking. yeah.
i dont care if i had to wear a dress to fuck her, she was super hot and i stand by my decision
Just want you to know I am def drunk enough to burn down your house. Don't worry I checked the stove like 6 times. I love grilled cheese
Dude, all I remember was you grabbing random girls, yelling "It's a rap video!" and pouring high-life on them.
YOU ARE TAKING ADVANTAGE OF MY INEBRIATED STATE
YOU ARE DRUNK AND USED AND SPELLED THE WORD "INEBRIATED" CORRECTLY. I AM TAKING ADVANTAGE OF NOTHING.
I CAN'T HELP THAT I'M MULTITALENTED YA FUCKER
Safe to say I'm terrified but totally AMPED
he's had a change of heart. and besides, we could use a laugh.
oh, well, if you all need a good laugh, by all means endanger my life.
Mom and dad should be so proud half of their children have gotten naked in the same local grocery store
The difference between 22 and 28 is bigger than I realised. I had the urge to put on Spongebob and give him a cookie.
I don't think he knows you can have sex sober...
I had to pee so bad that I snuck into the bathroom while they were in the shower. At her request, he was massaging her boobs so they could grow faster. Also there was a laser light machine.
As long as it's more "this is where i see an issue" vs "psst.... tiddies" then i have no argument
Randomize
