I chugged a bottle of robotussein and i ducking saw a blind lady on a purch sewing a shirt! And a tree portal
You were right. It hurts to walk today.
He looked me in the chest and said "I think I was visited by the titty fairy last night"
It's sad that I have started checking out the ring finger before the rack...I'm getting old
you don't understand, he speaks spanish and is tall. i have to do him.
Thats why you have fulfilling relationships with nice girls and i have kinky sex with crazies
I actually kinda like her but everyone else hates her, so consider it a third party grudgefuck.
Listen. You seriously only live once... there aren't that many cinco de mayos left until someone knocks u up and u have to have a shotgun wedding. Man up.
THIS IS NO TIME FOR SHAME JOSH. JUST GOTTA GET IT IN. PURELY FOR LEVELING UP PURPOSES
I see your walk of shame and raise you a day in jail wearing a girls old workout clothes.
Just kidding. Don't worry, you're getting sugar and orgasms for Valentine's day.
Last time I "ran into him" I ended up with the clap and had to explain why the ladder was missing from the garage.
I feel fine lol. I tried climbing a tree but the branch broke and I got arrested.
No I will not paint you for Mardi Gras in town. It is going to rain and you don't need another ID charge
She should be a lawyer. She convinced her husband to give her a hall pass AFTER he walked in on her in bed with her ex-bf
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