Nope it's a specific set of cards not like a normal ace, queen king thing....kinda like UNO, but instead of yelling UNO you get shitfaced
Oh my god. Just had sex with this girl on the boardroom table at my work at midnight (win!) just realized I left the condom wrapper on the table (lose!)
Don't take this the wrong way but I just mistook a trash can for you
Two penises later: I might be straighter than I think.
Are you available to help carry me into the house Monday?
Because I can't get laid, I'm day-drinking and hunting squirrels in the backyard. You can take the girl out of Montana...
If you're wearing dry underwear your day is already better than mine.
So my quick shower turned into a "lay in the shower and let the hot water reign over you because you are too hungover to wash your hair" shower. I'll be there closer to 1:30!
So I fucked him. Then I MC Hammer'd to the bathroom, where I did the robot in celebration of my accomplishment. And then I spent 10 mins fixing my toilet. But YOLO.
It just smells like spaghetti and despair.
I feel as though my head has drastically changed shape
she broke a 50 dollar bottle of alcohol. then passed out in front of her car and got sprayed by a skunk
all i remember is arguing with the chick that yahoo was better than google
all you were doing was yelling YAHOOOOO in her face
so i won
did i tell you guys i finally 69’d for the first time last night? just thought the group chat should know.
.......do you have the salami in bed? I'm trying to make a sandwich.
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