i think guys can sense when i'm not wearing underwear
normal stoners make pot brownies. gay stoners make pot chocolate covered cherries on a cinnamon graham cracker crust which by the way are very effective.
Saw a pregnant woman get a lap dance last night. I love the south.
like in an apt above a crackhead. A LEGIT CRACKHEAD. he woke me up every morning this week asking me if I wanted to buy a mini fridge and some CDs. at 5 am. EVERY DAY.
I left a cheeto on everyone's car trailing to the house i'm at, hanzel and gretel style.
I just noticed my teeth are no longer straight. Wondering if anyone had an explanation.
My right arm is handcuffed to my leg... Please help.
Fuck. The basement bathroom I've been getting head in for 6 months just went 'Out of Service'.
It looks like a baby bear tried to chew off my nipples.
sorry there isn't a 'perfect ass' emoji
He said the main reason he fucked me was cause of my storm trooper tattoo. IT ATTRACHES ALL THE HOT NERDS
Aint no party like a Broke College Girls Eating Stuffed Crust Pizza party
I feel like I might be the only person I know who eats bundles of radishes in-between orgasms from their vibrator.
I'm a peeled potato compared to her. I'm a peeled potato compared to anyone. I'm a peeled potato.
Are you high?
I need a significant other who'll eat Skittles from my boobs
Randomize
