grinding to god bless the USA? really?
shut up
Currently listening to 'Just Put it in Your Mouth.' remember when i went through that phase?
so...dinner was kid's cuisine and a bottle of wine. i think they go well together.
I am at the gas station and there is a whole amish family here I'm not sure why the amish need gas but I think its worth investigating
I got a 69.7 in accounting. I have this whole doing the bare minimum down to a science
Nothing says "I'm a sorority girl" like puking at 830 in the am, wearing my anti-hazing pin, and getting ready for a tea party.
she hid the dish soap because she was afraid someone would confuse it with the margaritas and drink it instead. her reasoning was "theyre both soo pink...i cant tell them apart"
are you aware you chucked your pizza at a girl's face after the bar last night?
Well then sir I'll probably see you tomorrow after my class and at 3 with your clothes off. Sounds like a solid way to start the weekend to me
The second I see you we're shot gunning beers
It's gonna be 8 o'clock in the morning
And your point is?
Marry me
I'll have a whole suitcase of emergency bacon with me obviously
is it just me or does "lol" kill any sort of vibe while sexting?
I passed out in your bed last night...there maybe a snickers and twix bar under your pillow
Fuuuuuck dude, he’s got #Excel in his Facebook bio; I’m screaming
My one night stand from last weekend is now taking me on a date this weekend. How is this my life?
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