I see my mary-anne walkin' awa-y-y! Bow Nahw now new, ne ne ne ne ne, ne ne nehw, ne ne new new Nah dan ah bwawn-now, ba bwan'll buh dada bwiddly doo.
That was supposed to be me air guitaring the solo from More than A Feeling
Everytime I think about NYE, my gag reflex kicks in.
I'm going to skip that pointless convo with Mark, stick with the "we're talking" status, and bone barely legal, borderline gay, preppy guys on the DL.
She was so adorably desperate I didn't have the heart to tell her I wasn't a lesbian. So now She's making waffles, may switch teams over this.
i just successfully used the word "hymen" in a paper...welcome to senior seminar in lit.
he was holding his dick in one hand and my boob in the other and i looked down and thought, this is my life
The bad decision stars are too close to aligning to risk this tonight.
I'be color coordinated the clothes in my closet and my underwear drawer. I'm like an advertisement for house arrest. Help.
The only thing I accomplished today was naming the bag of wine I've been drinking
he busted into the room with single cheese slices and started yelling "THROW SOME CHEESE ON THAT BITCH"
So how did it go?
I'm not sure if it was all the eggnog or all the alcohol, but hosting an eggnog pong tournament was a mistake.
I'm good. We walked you back to my apartment and you demanded to eat the sandwich I made for him
Not many people can say they've been photo bombed by an antelope. I sure did.
I'm definitely single now but she stole my mailbox
Update: tequila girl had her hand down groomsmen pants
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