Where are I am going home with Ryan
I don't know who this or Ryan is but it is probably too late to talk you out of it
At one point last night while tipping the bartender you looked at him and said "If I need money later, I'm taking this back"
its amazing how hard it is to tell vomit from stuffing the day after
Henry's handball, Tiger Wood's Car Crash, Roger Federer losing ... That's it....I'm throwing my Gillete away
i woke up completely naked except for a bottle of beer saran wrapped in between my boobs
Leave the bottle at home cause either way I'm not taking another shot. You have no idea how long it took me to compose this text free of grammatical error.
Gold star for you, but I'm on my way and the soco is buckled in next to me. This is happening.
In between rounds of sex, you stopped and did drunken handstand push-ups.
You were all "think outside the box, inside the bag!" as you filled your camelback with beer.
Yes. I will keep putting the beer into my stomach and eventually the bartender will make a mistake
Beat the bartender in a shot challenge for a free tab. I won that, and him. I never get tired of the "this is my first time with a guy.." bullshit.
How do you even...
The magic of Christmas. And whiskey, of course.
You kept chewing on the empty milk carton and saying "kitty" over and over again. It was an interesting night.
Another beautiful Sunday, another beautiful day the stick is not positive. Amen.
At a point I was just cumming dust last night
I checked her ID this morning. Lets just say...she's older than my mom
Drunk. Send nudes. Just curious.
Randomize
