"Reality" and all separate lives are the same thing?... We all have separate realities?! My life Has one reality and yours has another?
Haha how much did you smoke
4 feet of smokeee!
Saying she let herself go implies she was actually holding on
I feel like she's the kind of girl who always ends up with guys who have oddly shaped dicks..
You kept excitedly announcing to the bar what time it was. Followed by an equally excited "Clock language still makes sense!"
Come down here. We are watching people walk through the paper we taped in front of the elevator.
I may or may not have traded your body to the rodeo's owner for free beer.
So your bra was hanging in the Christmas tree last night at some point I think
i don't know why he's complaining, i'm the one with four hickeys on my ass.
If I don't get to have sex with him soon my entire female reproductive system is gonna climb out of my body and choke me to death
Just walked by the barren window naked in a family neighborhood. Who needs dignity.
can i get licensed in dentistry online like a priest
A guy I hooked up with YEARS ago just endorsed me on LinkedIn for "customer service".
I'm gonna fight the coyote
How much glitter would I have to ingest in order for a "magnificent" amount to appear in my ejaculate?
When you start lapping your martini like a cat it's time to go home. Partys over.
Randomize
