One of my students just wrote an essay on how ninjas, like drug addicts, must realize they need help before they can get better...I gave it an A+
What tipped you off? The sombrero?
vegan vag taste different. and not a good different
His best friend walked in while we were banging, turned on the light, yelled BURN, grabbed his computer to play the Thunderstruck drinking game, turned off the light and left.
He sent me an email apologizing for sleeping with her...and by that I mean he sent a picture of his dick to my school e-mail
And my cat won't make me food. She's a bitch
Just out of curiosity. Did you wait until my fb picture was well liked by others before liking it so people won't know we're fucking?
I'll pay you to write the paper but not for sex. You should only get paid for something you work hard at.
YOU CHEATED ON ME WITH THE WOMAN THAT IS STAYING AT YOUR HOUSE. FORGIVE ME IF IM NOT THINKING YOUR A DEDICATED BOYFRIEND.
Dinner at my parents is vodka, lemonade, cheese ad crackers. Why would I leave?
I just blacked back in and I'm at a kids birthday party in a suit and people are calling me uncle Carl. Never having your homemade liquor again.
I never said it was inaccurate, I said I hate you.
I just wrote a self loathing message to self, wrapped my credit card in it, put it in an envelope, sealed it with another hate messame, and put it in my lock box. So. That's where I'm at.
would it be awkward if i bring my husband?
only if i fuck you in the bathroom while he's paying the check
I’ve officially bought the ticket for my future dick appointment 😂
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