he had a blacklight sublime poster, of course i had to do him.
Do you know many girls there are in gay bars waiting for me to do coke off their tits? A lot.
Yea. You cant just squeeze my balls. They are sensitive
REAL PEOPLE DRINK 3 BEERS ALONE WILL WATCHING THE LIFETIME MOVIE ABOUT PRINCE WILLIAM AND KATE MIDDLETON
I have officially had sex in every room on my floor. Don't say I'm not an amazing RA.
Bren left me with a lovely parting gift. Newfouund alcoholism. I'm on the kitchen floor, hugging a bottle of vodka. It's my only friend now.
I'm trying not to drink. I may fall down if I move. This is bad. I had everclear before the bar. Oh no. Oh no. Breathe. Breathe. Breathe.
Normally this is when girls give blow jobs. That's how you mentally condition them to put up with PMSing, because they see the shinny blowjob light at the end of the tunnel.
I will take a blow job from a dude that kinda looks like a girl at this point
Downside to Halloween: you can't tell if the guy dressed as Gene Simmons from KISS that keeps flirting with you is hot or not...I decided to err on the side of caution and assume not...
I stopped his blowjob to raise 3 fingers & whistle the hunger games tune to the people walking past the window
I'm excited for you as you venture towards new drug experiences
I emptied a Vyvance capsule into my coffee pot last night and set the auto start. Pretty sure I've been drinking meth all morning
Curing hangovers with more alcohol was a great idea for the first five days
his mom walked in while he was eating me out. and my vag was facing the door. luckily his face was in it.
Randomize
