and by charming I mean he has a horse cock.
Is it wrong to want to cut a hole in the Tigger suit so I can molest you while I wear it?
Court Ordered Rehab!!! Do you think I'll need a swimsuit?
he was persistant. I supposedly owe him a bj from high school.
About to be a 4Loko vomit fountain in 45 seconds, what color will it be? Animated birds will fly out of me.
Well we did eat French fries lady-and-the-tramp style last night...
My liver needs the occasional pep talk and a reminder that we are two weeks into freshman year of college.
Please hurry. I'm the only one here who's not an attorney with a trophy wife.
Moral of the story: I had sex to Back to the Future last night.
I think I passed out drunk at my own jewelry party
This town is a penis wasteland. I haven't seen a suitable penis in months. This is becoming an emergency situation. I need penis in my life
I couldn't figure out what was more important, finishing the shot or putting out the fire on my leg.
just had a woman ask me to donate my eggs so that her baby could look like me. don't know whether to get a restraining order or be flattered. thoughts?
Are you really trying to argue your case that you seduced my cat?
there were rolls with just one bite out of each one leading to the bedroom. you were laying on the bed naked and yelled 'you did it you followed the bread crumbs!'
Randomize
