A big part of growing up is learning how to tastefully stare at women
Check Facebook. Random dude tagged us in photos from last night dancing at Denny's while eating a sampler platter. 1. How does he have our names, and 2. You said we ate at Tbell.
i swear to god. if they dont have practically DTF written on their foreheads, or a glowstick in their hands, strictly no entry.
I'm watching a man in drag spread food products on his face my life is spiraling out of control.
GO AHEAD, BITCH, GLARE AT MY WAFFLE ONE MORE TIME. I WILL FUCK YOU UP.
The least you could do is send me some gibberish so I know you're alive.
Fuhga
Thank you.
Well shit, I would've slept with him if I knew he was gonna be in the draft.
I just googled: how soon can I pee on a stick. What is my life coming to.
Also topless tea is a thing that happens in our apartment. Ready yourself.
should we try and roll a cross joint since its good friday? you know, for jesus
What part of I just want to watch porn, eat Taco Bell, and masturbate did you not understand?
stop texting me about your public sex.
says she who narrated getting eaten out in a movie theatre over text to me
day drinking didnt prepare me for this..
Dude. Don't do acid and go to Disney on ice. Hear my warnings. That snow monster will fuck your shit up.
She's chasing the cat around the house hitting it with a cardboard sword yelling "there can be only one!"
Randomize
