I told my boyfriend my favorite food was strawberry poptarts, now my email inbox is getting spammed with nude pics of him with his dick in a poptart box..
We couldn't find any ping pong balls, so we used a fishing bobber. Could we be more country?
So I'm about to go to his house and have "I'm really sorry for cheating on you last night" sex
My econ prof just gave me a shot glass because I was the "randomly picked" winner of the lecture. Ties into our supply and demand lecture, supplied with a shot glass, demand a thirsty thursday
he stopped midthrust to put on his sex playlist and the first song was 'can you feel the love tonight'
where do you find these guys?
I needed to do something spontaneous, and since no one had coke this was the next best thing.
Stoned, drunk, and walking into the library. Look at me multitasking!
I'm considering offering a class on how to find good porn.
Apparently I took a selfie with fried chicken at 2 am....I'm still trying to figure out where I got the chicken. I thought I was making mac & cheese.
you seriously don't remember..? but then again, you were taking shots by yourself for like 30mins
But what if there are 6 people and they end up just pairing the off into 3 couples. Is it still an orgy?
I should probably add her on Facebook for as much as I cheat off her in Physics, huh?
if it makes u feel better, i skipped class so i could go to a sex convention in jersey a few hours earlier than if i went to class.
Last night I tried to apply for a job at ihop. That drunk.
Sorry I bailed on you yesterday. I was propositioned.
And you don't turn down margaritas and oral.
Randomize
