Don't you send me to vm
Tickle wars 95% of the time end in sex.
I mixed the ketchup wit the mustard in one bottle to save time making hotdogs
You emptied out your taco and asked the lady for a refill...and then you continued to carry out a full conversation SCREAMING
Apparently it is impossible to get kicked out of taco bell....I'll try harder next time
Just pull your dick out and wink at her, its a game changing play
woke up next to the new dishwasher. set the record for banging a new employee to 6 hours...i should be a professional sexual predator
thought a girl was checking me out today. took me like 5 minutes to realize it was a mannequin
Question #1: Why am I on my living room floor? Question #2: Where did the bloody footprints come from? Question #3: Why are there two McChickens next to the wine bottle?
Don't Richard Nixon her vagina
One day, I might be old and married wishing I could bang everyone... and that'll be a problem. So I feel in my heart it's something I need to do.
Ur here to start shit and I'm here to light that shit on fire
At least you didn't lose your virginity to chumbawumba
Woke up with a throbbing vagina and a lesbian in my bed. Then for the hell of it we had morning sex. Definitley bisexual now
I’m traumatised. Bring vodka and condoms.
If I slept with her my dick would come out glittery
coward.
Randomize
