The pirates hijacked 3 more ships today!!
we need a boat to join in
Obama is on top of it we'd get killed within mins, but we'd live in legend foreva
so the situation is a+b=c where "a" is how much you weight, "b" is my gravitational pull, and "c" is how erect your penis is.
her eyes looked like someone had poured fruit punch in them. needless to say we had a good time.
I just had teddy grams, ritz crackers, and twizzlers for dinner. Hello, end of the semester.
I dont know if he should be happy or mad about it but he's too big for a blow job.
bring money and cleavage
His housemate was playing a sad violin solo for me on my way out. God I hate musicians.
i dont know everytime i see her teeth i get erectile disfunction
masturbating while the coffee brews is the new power nap
I actually didn't mind her sub-par blowjob skills.. It took me back to a time when skipping class was noticed, and my liver didn't look like a worn out shoe
He said that he didn't know what level the sun was on, and then he puked.
You picked a jagger girl up claimed her then walked out the door with her that was the last we saw of you
You're an asshole. I don't want your dick as my background. I'll look like I have a thumb fetish.
A giant panda just asked me for a cigarette and said "man pandas gotta smoke too." There is something wrong with this place.
Oh I see how it is...you can snap chat the world your balls but I wear dinosaur feetie pajamas and I'm the "weird one"
Randomize
