So she couldn't stop dragging her teeth while she was blowing me.
Ahh dude, that fucking sucks, what'd you do about it?
Decided to drag my teeth while eating her out... She got the point.
sooo i think when i get back from rothbury i should probably take a pregnancy test
but you would be showing by now. i'd just save the money and wait for a large crap in 6 months that starts crying. then you'll know.
You finger a girl once and she thinks she loves you. I'm going back to boys. Lesbians are needy.
I have no memory of puking on someone. Was he cute?
she's walking around the room telling people she can make the room move with her mind and then she shakes her head really fast yelling 'see?!'
I can't wait to get all this Makers out of my shoe.
i googled waterboarding like you asked. as long as you do it outside. we have carpet. but i wont be a part of it.
I have got to stop singing on voicemails. I just left my dad a 6 minute musical message.
I'm ready to take a few years of my life this weekend
I've hit an all time low I just sent a boob pict to fat Randall the one I gave a partial bj to a year a a half ago
I'm going through what feels like a break up with beer. I'm emotionally distraught from it's lack of presence.
If sandwichs had dicks, my life would be complete
I can't even be mad at customs in houstons airport anymore for missing my flight and having to stay overnight. Within an hour of meeting we did it at her place. Her last word being "glad I could show you real southern hospitality". I'm definitely coming back here someday
You thought they were asking for volunteers for a karaoke contest so you jumped up not realizing it was actually a "last 3 minutes boxing match". But you took that right hook like a champ.
When you're as high as I am right now brushing your teeth is both magical and fucking terrifying
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