If i come over, it means nothing
i don't have fun when you have fun. i have embarrassment, fear, and significantly less cash in my wallet.
He has crabs, not bed bugs. I recommend incoporating a clinic on this mornings walk of shame route.
She's locked herself in the bathroom with a tub of icecream and she's watching my little pony on her phone. We know it cause she sings with them.
He told the cop he was underage, handed the cop his ID, and the police report read "I then informed the suspect that he was not, in fact, underage"
How is it I was the last to know everyone calls me tig ole bitties? Did y'all have a meeting about this that I wasn't invited to?
I was just sitting on the ground alone in fetal position shivering and chewing on my hand when she found me. ecstasy was not my best idea.
the manly guy you want to date so badly? he's at the club. as a drag queen. wearing higher heels than you own. think about that.
Just gave a blow job while wearing a shirt that says 'world's coolest mom' idk how my conscience feels...
TONIGHT IS GOING TO BE A FUCKING BLAST. EVEN IF I HAVE TO SET OFF A BUNCH OF FIREWORKS IN YOUR KITCHEN.
also had sex in his sister's princess style bunk bed.
but you are a princess that one was appropriate.
like stop just cause your whole life has been one enormous reject pile does not mean that i have to suffer too
Thanks for coming out I think haley is drunk enough for breast milk White Russians
honestly, you deserve someone taller anyways
Some bitch is passed out in a pool of vomit. Fucking lightweight, it's only 8.30.
Oh, wait.. That's you.
Randomize
