I love seeing the creepers that friend request me outside of facebook. its like seeing a unicorn in the middle of campus.
she asked if mt Rushmore was natural or man made
Sunburnt clitoris. How do I deal with it.
All I learned from that experience was that drinking scotch out of a crunk goblet was bad news.
he made a bald eagle out of coke lines
I'm more concerned about the fact that I can't feel my gums
Also, I found out tonight a major plus for being female is you can accidentally call the hot bartender sweet tits and she won't get mad.
She's just so happy...and so naked.
Omg. I have a story to tell you later about that girl that just crawled on stage
I'm in the power napping at parties stage of my life
Out of curiosity, do you feel happiness for you, or sadness for ME, that you are the only one I drunk text?
you made a mix containing mostly whiskey. then you took a sip, gagged and yelled "perfect!"
At first it will make you think "how is this physically possible?" and then it will ruin an entire food group for you.
no real plans this weekend. trying to derail the alcohol induced fucking hell train I've been riding for the past three weeks.
I don’t understand his energy
What? Nice? Lmao
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