You'd love this place it's beautiful. Plus these people smell like garlic
So when does "going out for one drink" = giving some guy an HJ on the sidewalk?!?
The money shot is kinda like the "The End" part of a children's book isn't it?
my night ended in me puking all over jenna's bed, then me trying to wash the sheets in the toilet.
sometimes when i'm drunk i choose the spanish option on the ATM to challenge myself.
i had to get the starbucks manager to open the bathroom door for me...you passed out on the floor, the things i do for you
im trying to find a facebook picture of him that doesnt make me regret sleeping with him. its not working
Hes flirting with her via the sauce packets at taco bell....... I have no words
I made out with a bride-to-be last night at the bar. Jesus died for our sins right?
you were standing in two feet of water, screaming at people walking by to "call river rescue".
I guess I realized I had a problem when I ordered 4 shots and told the bar wench to pour them all into 1 glass
I was like wtf you can warn a girl like hey I have a huge dick and I fuck for hours
Someone google feeding your vagina Advil and Neosporin
He said I gave him the best head he's ever had and I bowed. I BOWED.
It was good. Ended up having a 3 hr make out session with her
What is this high school
There was a lot of catching up to do bro
I’m really regretting these suede pants.
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