so last night was fun and all.. but you might want to get tested
dude, seriously he just sucked the milk out of the dogs breast and swallowed it... for $20, wtf....?
forgot a fork. i am eating fettucini alfredo with a comb that i rinsed off the the bathroom sink. eating alone in my car. life doesn't get any sadder than this
I just feel as thought we should spend the day in which we celebrate relationships the same as how we started them. Drunken hook ups.
I've never seen a grown man cry so much after getting jerked off by a stripper. I say it's the best $600 he ever spent.
Ok so now that we've actually had sex do I get the last name or are u really witness protection status?
Just realized how sopa could affect my ability to watch porn, son of a bitch
I will kill you in such a brutal way if you ever de-pants me again on the dance floor it will make the stock market ticker
She just pored wine down the turkeys hole and said that she christened it like the whore that it is...happy thanksgiving.
Its funny that for once I get home and I'm just as high as my parents are.
I'm eating shredded cheese and chugging coke, until I can function again. I'm tingling everywhere
I just lectured my ex boyfriend on how to eat a girl out what has my life come to
Dick very happy bro
sam was dropping a deuce next to me. wrote me a note that said "glad we shared this experience." passed it under the wrong stall. the other guy picked it up. that's all I know so far.
It’s a prereq for med school, so I hope the professor likes blow jobs
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