belinda wants 2 know wr u got ur butt pads
i dont wear butt pads that thang is au naturel
Yeah...right...LMAO
I want to stick my p in your. b.
Last nIght I drank wIth the new guy from fellowshIp & my pastor I've known sInce I was 7. It was agreed by them that I had nIce tIts. I'm not weIrded out In fact I'm flattered...
She wouldn't go home with me cause I forgot her name. I didn't realize it would matter after she danced with her vagina on my face
she's laying in my bed with an ice pack on her vagina. how do you think it went?
It's like I opened a door and behind it lay mythical creatures sprinklin fairy dust upon the land leading me to a pot of gold. And that gold is some delicious cock.
He used the phrase "no problemo" in a sext. It's over.
Pretending to leave a voicemail when the person answers the phone....that's gotta be drunk dial level 99
It is becoming increasingly more likely that my entire halloween costume will be entirely composed of borrowed clothing from the two girls I'm hooking up
thanks again for a nice night (and please don't fuck my boss)
I don't think I used nearly enough fucks in my reply to convey the level of fuck him.
Sometimes self-care is taking a shot of vodka and moving on.
he came over last night and we fucked with the great british baking show on in the background. it was beautiful
maybe you should have closed the porn before you gave the professor your computer to hook up to the projector?
Btw I puked in your glovebox
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