Alarm just got pulled in my exam
Swear it wasn't me
God dammit. Now I'm pissed at Arizona, while feeling bad for my poor, poor penis.
yeah, we don't understand. the wings losing for guys is like girls finding objects in their body..just weird and sad
I don't have a choice really. It's either lose 15 lbs by Halloween, or I'm going as a giant banana.
They just caught the deck on fire and I ran out with cups off the beer pong table filled with water from the toilet. It was the closest water source.
She wants to have naked weekends
They call that free range vagina in France
I wonder when walk of shame thursdays in the rain will finally make me stop drinking.
do you remember the random banging on my door at 3 am wearing 2 budlight cases as a dress
i made up my own drinking game and i took a secret shot every time someone asked me about school or my future
I like how you were offering me $50 last night to come home with you to take care of you and your dog
You give an incredible blow job. I wanted to make sure you know it was appreciated
I woke up in the basement of a pizza restaurant... I would say the tequila hit me pretty hard.
If I don't get struck by a lightning bolt from God by midnight it will be a Christmas miracle.
What can i say, my face is nice and my body is just unreal. And my beer pouring/stealing is incredible \n
I don't care. It's wine Wednesday get your gameface on.
Randomize
