wow. When I'm done with him he's going to have to pop his collar in necessity and not just douchery
Is it weird that I think of Ennis from Brokeback Mountain everytime I hear "Make em Say" by Master P? "I don't need your money. Huh." NA NA NA NAAA.
Never again let me pretend to be australian for free booze.
It's nice to sit in the library and see the progression from freshman pledge to 6th year coke addict all at one table. Gotta love sororities
Sonogram pictures belong on a fucking fridge...NOT FACEBOOK!!
Today might be the day that I legitimately throw up in my saxophone.
He calls it "his noble steed" and i plan to ride it.
My password hint says "not sunset, also facebook." i need to stop doing computer things while high. I will never figure this clue out.
Dude she's on meds. He has a ginormous penis. Ur A dumbass. That concludes our feelings chat. Dim Sumday?
I bought us both waterproof cases so we can sext through FaceTime in the shower.
Next. Level. Shit.
Two chicks walked outta his room and all he did was beat his chest like LeBron and yell, "And 1!"
I made out with a guy so that I could get ahead in the bathroom line, totally acceptable
We watched X-Files, ate pizza, and he played with my butt. It was a pretty standard Monday.
I feel like I got run over by a steamroller made of cigarettes and booze driven by all of the men I've slept with.
Everything is a learning experience. Last night we learned why I'm not allowed to bring guys home from the bar....
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