At a strip club after monster truck rally. You should be here
Have you ever chased with pilaf before? Because dont.
id pay someone 5 dollars to tell me whos house im at right now. comfy couch though
If youre the one that ate my brownies this morning I only have two things to say to you
Those had pot in them
And good luck on your interview asshole
because you can't take the autistic girl you're babysitting on a blunt ride.
Rachel and his cat watched us 69 last night. I pretended to be embarrassed the next day... But to be honest I like an audience
Does peppermint hummus sound good or am I just high?
Just met another girl you fucked but this time in seattle. Your cock gets almost as much mileage as jet blue. Anaheim and seattle both say hi, figured you don't remember their names.
Me too. We could do it like prostitutes. No kissing on the mouth.
I walked into the bathroom of the hotel and she's in the bath tub with a guy she met a day ago. They were sharing a shrimp cocktail platter and shot gunning bud lights. Oh and it was noon.
If I hid at school to avoid the cops, is it fleeing and evading or just being a good student?
I was loaded. my pee still has a hint of lime
You walked up to a random girl on the street and asked her for a bite of her pizza...
it doesn't matter what you do now, you will forever be known as the girl who fell off the roof
nooooo! we need to brain storm. I need rebranding....what if I start always showing up with my cat or a wacky hat?
try again roofio
I smell like a mix of alcohol, sweat, and sex and its only 10 AM
Randomize
