Assholes at mcdonalds drive through wouldn't serve us last night even though we said we were on small motorcycles that were to small for them to see and weren't heavy enough for the sensors. We made noises and everything.
How do i write this on his wall without making it sound like he gave me an std?
her tits were misleading. turns out she wasn't cool, smart and funny
still haven't packed clothes. only wine. gotta love spring break
There aren't nearly as many guys masturbating on chatroulette as i was led to believe...i feel cheated
Dude you picked up her Chihuahua and threatened to kill it yelling "it's not cinco de mayo, bitches"
To say the least, now you know you're a proper lady, passing a field sobriety test in heels...
Just coat-checked 2 backpacks full of 40's...it was the bouncer's idea.
Depending upon how the Sox game progresses, I'll either cry on the bar or fuck someone tonight...
then looked at this little girl next to me and was like "don't drink when you get older and don't let your best friend be with assholes." she looked at me like i was crazy
Also, totally got laid in my yellow rubber boots and it was awesome.
Take your time. I'm mowing the lawn. In the dark. Drunk.
The Olympian is in my bed
Is it ok to bone a former patient who is also a client? Since it is two negatives does that cancel and become a positive?
Not sure what you smoked, but you put raw bacon on the lazy Susan and spent 45 minutes looking at it and mumbling Meat Spin
Randomize
