i blew a .213 what kind of thug blows the compton area code exactly? this guy
fuck yea just found my unicorn costume from when i was 8... still fits
And people are going to start dressing like that in public, it's just ridiculous, the goths and now the GAGAs
the people next to us in line are buying a 12 pack and a snuggie
i just dedicated my kegstand to your breasts
She fell out the car soaking wet and screaming "im wearing a fedora!" then tryed to seduce him on the front lawn in front of his middle aged neighbor
no more heavy drinking durning the lady that cleans the office told me i have to emtpy my own thrash if i puke in it
How would u feel about transportimg a penis shaped ice luge to nashville?
In the middle of having sex, she said "if we continue, we're dating." I then pulled out and sat in the corner, naked. I deserve a Medal of Honor.
The sorority chicks were the Persian army, and we were their 300 Spartans. Can barely stand up now...such a good ratio
At a party. It smells like teen pregnancy and sadness in here.
Instead of medicine they should just give ecstasy. Also I'm tingly and can't find u guys. A gay man just said he loved me... :( / :)
So, I'm about to take my pants off in the Walmart parking lot, when am old lady parks next to me. I'm all the way in the back next to the semis. What the hell?
Drunk me is basically the Oprah of nudes. Everyone gets one.
And now, by the power vested in me by the state of intoxication, I now pronounce you fucking awesome.
Randomize