garbage
garbage dick
rubbish cock
you win
Erica just called me. She woke up in a storage closet in Mike's building with one shoe and no bag. Can you check your photos from last night to see if she had it at the bar?
"romantic friends" sounds more classy then friends with benfits
everyone who works at gamestop is basically destined to live with their parents for the rest of their lives... so i said no.
Judging by the fact that my hair was glued to my head with vomit, yeah I think I couldve used a friend last night
My getting drunk and marrying a stranger in Vegas final court annulment papers just came in the mail... I might frame that shit
Look, if he's not the brother with three nipples, I'm just not interested.
who has not yet felt my sugrcially enhanced boobs. HurryI am at the bnar and it is 1:15 am
I had to keep telling myself 'you can't be mad at him because you peed on him'
Yeah! I was just fired because there was an over hire and the new girl is hotter than me. Seeing as how the new girl is my baby sister I think punching my manager is excusable.
Send help, water and tortillas.
I'm taking a dab in mourning of how long its been since I smoked with you guys.
Growing a beard is gonna make smoking a pipe look so much more majestic
she fell asleep in a torn bush after playing cards at a nursing home.
Once again I let my vagina make the decisions...that and vodka :(
Randomize
