no homo or anything but the way you were dancing with that girl gave me a boner
Is it sanitary to roast marshmallows over a cigarette lighter?
My 8 year old wants to name our new cat "fur burger". how do i explain that this is not really appropriate?
I've spent the last three hours watching 30 rock and eating marshmallows and ham. I'm considering taking up weed to justify my lifestyle.
No I'm not proud of you for not sleeping with him. He has herpes. You don't get a gold star for behaving how you're expected to. Trust me. I'm a teacher.
I feel eeeverything like there's a rhythm and everything can be felt w/o ever touching it. And it's beautiful. Sunshine or raindrops it's like orgasming. Everything has a taste.
I just had to MC for a middle school event with jizz on my dress. I'm going to hell.
According to FB I fucked in a field 365 days ago.
Just once I'd like to throw a party where I don't have to clean up someone else's blood the next morning.
We never did figure out who the stuff on the wall came from, did we?
of course we have a beer bong
how else would we feed our christmas tree
This is embarrassing but i think i might have left my fake tooth at your house on your night stand.
omg he is no good in bed, bless his little heart and his big dick
I've never seen an uncircumcised penis. I mean in person. I've clearly seen an uncircumcised penis. I have the google.
I made out with a mom and her daughter and got a black eye, so yeah, my birthday went well
dude, I felt like being high in a Santa hat and eating five boxes of cookies was right for today.
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