I look like Roseanne just got in a bar fight with Rosie O'Donnell.
Just went to my life planning class. The professor has a braid going halfway down his back and an earring.
No flights in Europe due to the volcano erupting. God himself is telling me to spend 4.20 in Amsterdam.
Well, as a member of the greater american southwest gay community I just have to mark this as a total loss and you will be missed.
passed a homeless guy with a sign that read "420 vetran" we gave him a bowl of bud
I don't know if you remember, but I was only wearing an afghan.
And I told him that even though were not together, if he has sex with anyone I would have sex with someone else, video tape it and send it to him.
You motherfucker. I just had an MRI with a penny under my boob.
Although I'm glad you didn't let my climb in the sink, I really wish you would have let me pretend to be a duck in the shower for a little longer
I woke up with what appeared to be LSD in my pocket. Know anything about this?
I'm sorry I was just sleeping on the kitchen floor I'm too dead to think
You're the only person I know who's experienced a micropenis and a magnum XL penis
It's really hard to tweet with a pussy in your face demanding attention.
If she didn't have scissors in her hand I would have motor boated the fuck out of her when she was done cutting my hair.
I just bartered a blowjob for the ex-fiancée's engagement ring. FTW!
Randomize
