i've decided that sluttiness is like a disease, it can lay dormant in you for years and then one day you go to college and with all the booze and drugs and boys and time on your hands symptoms begin to show then one day BAM you're a huge slut. it's like how izzie had skin cancer and it grew into brain cancer.
You can now add 30,000 feet to the places where I have puked
flashcards smell like vodka and my textbook is in the toilet. ready for the final
I've officially moved beyond college drinking. I just got business drunk at an internship seminar.
Just before going down on me she said, "I need a hairband for all of the jobs I'm about to perform."
There is a bottle of ciroc waiting graciously on my breakfast table. It's almost a sign for me to live up to my Russian blood.
Is it bad of me to apply as a night shift counselor at a boys orphanage purely because of how laid that would get me at bars?
Can I steal her, take her home, and feed her only vodka?
Is it bad that I'm using the photo I took for my fake ID as my linkedin profile pic?
What am I even going to do with 20 more jello shots? And don't say give them to the cat
You know darned well I have a well-documented weakness for redheads, Subway and hand-drawn graphic novels.
Just witnessed a man yell "gonna catch a slut!" at himself in the mirror while doing bicep curls at the gym.
I was...perplexed.
I'm determining which apartments I'm mostly to move into based on how suitable the kitchens are for sex .
havent showered in 2 days. just Febrezed my balls in the car before going into a movie alone with a 40 of Guinness.there isn't a word in English for how single I am.
I'm having to shit out rocks
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